since i joined the OnProbation team last year, i was told that the best way to cure writer’s block is by downing a few shots of whatever i feel is my liquor of choice. well, tonight that drink is none other than the fine cognac of Hennessey mixed with just a splah of sour mix. i must say, the combo has got me feelin’ quite fine. with my well-over-21 inhibitions set free, let’s have ourselves a candid conversation about anal sex.

butt fucking, taking a trip up the hersey highway, hot rear action, exit 69, back door betty.. whatever you want to call it, anal sex is one of those topics that gets most girls squeamish at the first mention of the act. but who can blame them? during undergrad i have heard some pretty gross variations on the practice. do you guys know what a “dirty sanchez” is? that is when a guy shoots cum up a girl’s arsehole, thicks his thumb in her butt, and then wipes the messy concoction across her upper lip. what better way can a frat boy show his affection for his delightful little cum-thirsty sorority sister?

but wild variations aside, i haven’t met many girls that are enthusiastic about having their lower intenstines realigned by an over-zealous butt-fucker. besides porn stars, groupies, hookers, and other ladies that more or less fuck for a living, there are not so many girls in this world whose assholes can handle that type of pressure, literally! now don’t get me wrong, i know there are quite a few chicks that genuinely enjoy well-timed rim jobs and the occasional thumb-in-de-butt during some rough sex. no one can deny that that part of the female anatomy is extremely sensitive with tons of its own often neglected nerve endings. but when you start talking about anything larger than a big toe, you have to move over to that list of girls that are into having their pleasure spiked with pain.

what is my preference? i’m more of an exit-only kind of girl. i think certain body parts are shaped the way they are for a reason and i’m not too amped about altering those shapes. but my own prude beliefs aside, there are ways to handle hardcore backdoor action without doing your date any major harm. the main one is just one word, say altogether now fellas, VASELINE! no not water, not lotion, not baby oil, not chapstick (yes, some clowns have actually been that desperate). You need a really heavy, greasy, petrolum based substance to get the proper lube going before you make your big entrance. it also helps if you aren’t hung like a wild beast. this is definatley one time when having a monster cock is NOT an asset (pun totally intended). the bigger you are, the less likely a smart girl will be to letting you take it to that ultimate low on her. so all you modest-sized guys, there’s your benefit!

but i am much more interested in hearing from some of you about your own anal preferences, techniques, and reservations. if you are reading this then you are no doubt like most other OnProbation cats: a big fan of ass and a lot of it! but tell me this, how much do you REALLY love booty?

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