Model? No…Whore? Yes!

Model? No…Whore? Yes! Posted in Classic on November 03rd, 2005

For one moment, lets be really serious. im talking secret squirrell in enemy territory type serious **puts the hat on**.

Why does every chick that gets half naked in front of a camera think she is a model? The ability to look somewhat sexy while being half-naked in recent years has been HIGHLY overrated (someone been blowing some of these ugly chicks head up, and they should HANG for it!). The act really isn’t that hard for a woman (being that we just want you that way anyway). If you have to be naked to be cute, as far back as i can remember, then you’re either a stripper or a hoe (neither of which is bad in their own right). My problem is people never really want to admit WHAT they really are.

WARNING!!! INCOMING EXAMPLES!!!

“I will suck your dick for a photoshoot this time, but i’m a model”

“I shook my ass to the beat in the basement and took pictures with my cam phone, I must be a model!”

“I show my tits and pussy for money on cam, its FATE that I be a model!”

Still confused? GOOD! Lets consult our good old friend the dictionary for some clarification…

**picks up phone and dials**
Me: Hey Webster!
Dictionary: Yesss?
Me: What does the term “model” mean?
Dictionary: A person employed to display merchandise, such as clothing or cosmetics. Why do you ask?
Me: This one whore trying to tell me she a “model” but shes not selling anything with her pussy all over my screen!
Dictionary: well a WHORE is a person who accepts payment in exchange for sexual relations (i.e. to relate with them in a sexual manner). so i think she should be calling herself a whore
Me: Thanks Dude, you ROCK!
Dictionary: Anytime dude, Anytime
**hangs phone up**

HA! He told YOU hoes! and being that his knowlede spans hundreds of years i’m inclined to have a listening ear to him. If you dont, then move to spain and fuck a bullrider. Anyone who actually works with, photographs, studies the art of, or fucks intently a model knows that being a model is more than being pretty. being a model is work, and usually contains some ability to look good with clothes on and off, to speak well (and speak good ENGLISH) in public, to maintain an image, and SELL a product. Modeling is a JOB. In laymans terms, if all you sell is your own sex then…um…you’re a whore. REAL life sucks huh? Deal with it dude, we all have to wake up sometime.

Did I mention that ugly people cant really model? I mean its true that someone who is ugly to you might be fucking beautiful to the other guy. so I keep wondering to myself if HE thinks you’re beautiful, who infected his eyes with gout and gouged them halfway out

HEEEEERRRREEE WEEEE GOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
-spins the wheel on some internet “models” (random pick 3)

http://www.akahoney.com
Not only does she not sell anything of value, but she looks like tiny from xcape and no dude I know thinks that guffaw faced chick is cute. So its like, what-the-fuck-are-you-doing-to-my-eyes-and-WHY?

http://www.ilovetaneish.com
I mean if you make a whack porno AND you’re ugly then you should just stop…like pronto. however taneish is not afraid to try some really kinky shit to i think her ugliness is kinda offset by her kinkiness. maybe not…moreso not…

http://www.sweetfaith.com
who is a total bootleg version of amber fox (who does cam shows **cough**). she should like…just be a tip drill and be content with that shit because no one I know (even my own MAMA) has ever said she was pretty…except for another ugly person… or that ugly bitch cheerleader (oh, my bad a TUMBLER) ToSlane (well known internet model jockey).

a review of todays “you might not” list
you might not be a model, even if you look good naked (hell gargamel looks good naked)
you might not be a model, even if you like taking pictures (photoshop is a HELL of a drug)
you might not be a model, if you’re BUTT FUCKING UGLY (go play with the dog…now)