so i go out to the club… i get myself a drink…. and i’m jammin. u know cuz when you go in the club a nigga can’t just be standin around and shit with nuthin in ya hand. i mean… i’m broke but i don’t want to LOOK broke ya dig? the fact that i’m IN the club means i got 20 or 30 dollars to burn. if i got a drink in my hand, that at least takes me up another level beyond them broke niggas who can’t afford the 11 dollar drinks…. so i’m jammin’… they playin some hot ass music… that hip hop shit that makes ya wanna *unh.. unh…[i’m doin a real mellowed out, “on a slut hunt” dance]*. i see this chick… HOT fuckin braud. i mean, she had these big ass titties that look like they was ’bout to just jump out her dress… and you know i fucks with that hypnotic & hennessy so everything looked like 10 times bigger. it was like she had 2 gigantic krispy kreme donuts sittin on her chest. nigga i wanted to eat… her ass was like so big and round…. you know how we are fellas. for some reason, the farther a braud’s ass sticks out the more we wanna try to reach her pussy when we hittin it from behind. these days ass is more addictive than fried chicken, chitlins, collard greens, tv, and weed all rolled up in a FAT ass blunt. whenever a nigga sees a female walk by, he ALWAYS checks her ass out… its like she’s on the “daaaaamn…” list from the front, but if she aint got no ass, she immediately gets moved over to the “maybe after i get good and fucked up” list. so anyway…. i see this braud and she’s SICK fine. you KNOW i gotta say SOMETHIN before i leave up outta here. i figure i’ll buy her a drink… that’s customary right? u see a braud in the club, you think she’s hot…our brief conversation went like this:

me: hey… how ya doin?…
girl: i’m aight… just thirsty
me: is that right?
yeah: mmm hmm [turns slightly to give a better view of the ass] thas right!
me: aight so what u drinkin? but wait… before we go there: how many drinks do i need to buy before we back in my room fuckin?

cuz you know that’s what we all there for right? come on… aint nobody goin to the club lookin for “Mrs Nigga In Da Club”. get outta here with dat. all us guys go in the club tryin to find the quickest path to get ONE of you bitches but ass naked with our dick in your mouth…. pussy… or ass… whichever is most convenient…. and women can’t be mad about the shit. they DO be mad bout it but… they SHOULDN’T be. i mean, look what they go to the club and do: they don’t pay shit to get in, they don’t pay for drinks (even when they SHOULD pay, they just wait for some horny ass nigga to shell out the dough in HOPES of gettin some pussy). they KNOW this before they washed their ass, put on makeup, did their hair, threw on the tightest thing they could find that shows the MOST ass, called their friends & talked shit for an hour, got in the car and drove 50 miles, stepped out the car, shook their ass & played with the hyper horny nigga at the door so they could get in the club for free. they knew it. they won’t spend a DIME and got a master lock on the pussy. aint dat a bitch? fortunately, in exactly 14 days i will be getting on a flight to Bangkok, Thailand where i’ll be fucking the hot braud you see in the featured photo and i will do so without any of the aforementioned drama. on top of the that, it’ll cost around 20 bucks + the cost of condoms and lube. care to join me?
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